Event Comment: Thomas Brown to
George Moult, 12 Sept. 1699: But tho'
Bartholomew-Fair is dead
and buried for a twelvemonth, yet it is some consolation to us, that it revives in both
the play-houses. Poetry is so little regarded
there,
and the audience is so taken up with show
and sight, that an author will not much trouble himself about his thoughts
and language, so he is but in fee with
the dancing-masters,
and has a few luscious songs to lard his dry composition. One would almost swear, that
Smithfield had removed into
Drury-lane and Lincolns-Inn-Fields, since
they set so small a value on good sense,
and so great a one on trifles that have no relation to
the play. By
the by, I am to tell you, that some of
their late bills are so very monstrous, that nei
ther we, nor our forefa
thers, ever knew anything like
them:
They are as long as
the title-pages to some of
Mr Prynn's works; nay, you may much sooner dispatch
the Gazette, even when it is most crowded with advertisements.
And as
their bills are so prodigious, so are
the entertainments
they present us with: For, not to mention
the Bohemian women, that first taught us how to dance
and swim toge
ther; not
the famous
Mr Clinch of
Barnet, with his kit
and organ; nor
the worthy gentlemen that condescended to dance a
Cheshirerounds, at
the instance of several persons of quality; nor t'o
ther gentleman that sung like a turky-cock; nor, lastly, that prodigy of a man that mimick'd
the harmony of
the Essex lions; not to mention
these
and a hundred o
ther notable curiosities, we have been so unmercifully over-run with an inundation of Monsieurs from
Paris, that one would be almost tempted to wish that
the war had still continued, if it were for no o
ther reason but because it would have prevented
the coming over of
these light-heel'd gentlemen, who have been a greater plague to our
theatres, than
their privateers were to our merchantmen. Shortly, I suppose, we shall be entertain'd here with all sorts of sights
and shows, as, jumping thro' a hoop; (for why should not that be as proper as
Mr Sympson's vaulting upon
the wooden-horses?) dancing upon
the high ropes, leaping over eight men's heads, wrestling, boxing, cudgelling, fighting at back-sword, quarter-staff, bear-baiting,
and all
the o
ther noble exercises that divert
the good folk at
Hockley; for when once such an infection as this has gain'd ground upon us, who can tell where it will stop? What a wretched pass is this wicked age come to, when
Ben. Johnson and Shakespear won't relish without
these bagatelles to recommend
them,
and nothing but farce
and grimace will go down? For my part, I wonder
they have not incorporated
parson Burgess into
their society; for after
the auditors are stupify'd with a dull scene or so, he would make a shift to relieve
them. In short,
Mr Collier may save himself
the trouble of writing against
the theatre; for, if
these lewd practices are not laid aside,
and sense
and wit don't come into play again, a man may easily foretell, without pretending to
the gift of prophecy, that
the stage will be shortliv'd,
and the strong
Kentish man will take possession of
the two play-houses, as he has already done of that in
Dorset-Garden (
The Works of Thomas Brown, 4th ed. [
London, 1715], I, 216-18)